MURDER!
Solve the Mystery
credit.
Wednesday, April 7, 2010
URKOBOLD Testimony before House Committee
URKOBOLD has been summonsed to testify before House Committee #69 re: matters of grave urgency and importancy. American Secure Society Rehabilitation for Energy and Anti Malfeasance is the topic.
Through great bravery, some Bothan spies managed to wikileak the video of the opening statement, read by one of the Minions of URKOBOLD
More as this story develops.
credit. purchase. etc.
Through great bravery, some Bothan spies managed to wikileak the video of the opening statement, read by one of the Minions of URKOBOLD
More as this story develops.
credit. purchase. etc.
Alternative to Medicine
Save yourself from Big Pharma! You have a healthful alternative! The power is in your hands! All you have to do is Buy It!
Courtesy of Skeptoid, episode 200
Courtesy of Skeptoid, episode 200
Tuesday, April 6, 2010
Congratulations National Champions
Hier at URKOBOLD, we tend to enjoy the corruption competition of sports. Besides the NBA and NCAA Football and undue influence exercised by ESPN to promote certain teams we really enjoy basketball.
As such the69 65 lucky teams in the bracket got whittled down to one last night.
Apparently it's ROYALTY that won.
Congrats to PRINCE on winning its fourth title in school history
In honor, we hereby shall play the school's anthem.
Congratulations again, Prince, on a worthy victory. You really opened up your own Michael Vick on those bulldogs!
*searches for video on utoob*
Well, apparently the school is private and doesn't allow utoob videos. Who knew!
but we better give a photo credit.
As such the
Apparently it's ROYALTY that won.
Congrats to PRINCE on winning its fourth title in school history
In honor, we hereby shall play the school's anthem.
Congratulations again, Prince, on a worthy victory. You really opened up your own Michael Vick on those bulldogs!
*searches for video on utoob*
Well, apparently the school is private and doesn't allow utoob videos. Who knew!
but we better give a photo credit.
Monkey Tuesday: Scientists Teach Gorilla the Lack of Meaning in His Pathetic Existence
"Quigley's 2,000-word vocabulary has proven insufficient to express his emptiness."
Monkey Tuesday: Beisbol and Controversy
Highnumber hepped us to The Beisbol Project.
It did not disappoint.
Meanwhile, we have also heard that John Cocktosen was cut from the band, to be replaced by John "Stumpy" Pepys, who was revived after that bizarre gardening accident, all those years ago.
Well, apparently John has his chance again. Stumpy was not found the other day, prompting people to wonder whether he even was revived.
credit all around.
It did not disappoint.
Meanwhile, we have also heard that John Cocktosen was cut from the band, to be replaced by John "Stumpy" Pepys, who was revived after that bizarre gardening accident, all those years ago.
Well, apparently John has his chance again. Stumpy was not found the other day, prompting people to wonder whether he even was revived.
credit all around.
Monday, April 5, 2010
Thought of the Day
Sweet Moon, I thank thee for thy sunny beams.
I thank thee, Moon, for shining now so bright.
For by thy gracious, golden, glittering gleams,
I trust to take of truest Thisbe sight.—
But stay, O spite!
But mark, poor knight,
What dreadful dole is here!
Eyes, do you see?
How can it be?
O dainty duck! O dear!
Thy mantle good,
What, stained with blood?
Approach, ye Furies fell!
O Fates, come, come,
Cut thread and thrum.
Quail, crush, conclude, and quell!
credit, of course.
I thank thee, Moon, for shining now so bright.
For by thy gracious, golden, glittering gleams,
I trust to take of truest Thisbe sight.—
But stay, O spite!
But mark, poor knight,
What dreadful dole is here!
Eyes, do you see?
How can it be?
O dainty duck! O dear!
Thy mantle good,
What, stained with blood?
Approach, ye Furies fell!
O Fates, come, come,
Cut thread and thrum.
Quail, crush, conclude, and quell!
credit, of course.
Mr. Steven Crane Monday
Since Crane is captured by evil fiziks types, we need to figure out the beisbol season.
Prediction 1: ESPN will fall over itself in promoting a few teams and then wonder, come post season, why the ratings are low
Prediction 2: The Colorado Rockies will still play at altitude when at home
Prediction 3: Tampa will be somewhat close to sea level
Prediction 4: there will be some nearly constant difference in altitude between them.
Prediction 1: ESPN will fall over itself in promoting a few teams and then wonder, come post season, why the ratings are low
Prediction 2: The Colorado Rockies will still play at altitude when at home
Prediction 3: Tampa will be somewhat close to sea level
Prediction 4: there will be some nearly constant difference in altitude between them.
Sunday, April 4, 2010
Sunday: Tatort
20.15 on ARD
hier
absolutely rocks!
credit.
i'd say go hence and purchase, but they're too dumb to realize that people actually want to buy this stuff, and they don't sell 'em
hier
absolutely rocks!
credit.
i'd say go hence and purchase, but they're too dumb to realize that people actually want to buy this stuff, and they don't sell 'em
Saturday, April 3, 2010
Friday, April 2, 2010
Wayne Sulu Friday
Wayne was getting tired of this. He was watching the Attorney for the Insurance Company read over his report. He had emailed it. He sent it by mail. He could have faxed it, sent it by messenger too. No. The Attorney for the Insurance Company wanted the email, registered mail, and hand-delivered copy.
Now, Wayne was sitting in the plush office sitting there while the Attorney for the Insurance Company read through the report.
Wayne leaned back and looked around. It was furnished in "Danish Modern", very minimalist, with elegant wood. The desk was in the corner, so it could get eastern and southern sun exposure. He had some sort of fancy blind system and window tinting to prevent too much sun. The windows had wider sills than normal, giving the impression they were half seats, reminiscent of the leaning seats in older Paris Metro stations.
The desk looked like two open end tables with a bridge between them. Or should I, given the atmosphere, say betwixt?
Wayne was actually glad he came to the offices of the Attorney for the Insurance Company: he had not seen an office in Danish Modern in years and years. It did not match the occupant. Youngish, dressed in "mod-conservative", no doubt to show he was laid-back, ready to throw out trendy jargon, and know the hit that flooded the airwaves until sane people were ready to drill rusty paperclips into their ears to stop the awful "ear worm".
But in reality, he was full of himself, the most pompous stuffed shirt Wayne had to deal with since that Executive from Victoria, BC.
The Attorney for the Insurance Company leaned a bit to his right, pushed a button, and someone entered the room.
She was well dressed, as was everybody in the company. Wayne realized he would have noticed that, regardless of gender. Not that it matters.
She was wearing charcoal slacks, black conservative-looking shoes, and a black blazer with some sort of whatever underneath. Her hair was black and straight, going just beneath her shoulders. She handed him an envelope.
Wayne looked at it. It was payment. And it was considerably larger than they contracted. He looked up at the Attorney for the Insurance Company with a raised eyebrow.
Without a word, he took a sheet of paper from his desk and handed it to Wayne.
Hot damn. That's high up. This is now officially a "big case".
Without a word, Wayne got up and exited. Down on the street he inhaled deeply. He had indeed found the culprit, but now he was hired, or "engaged" as no doubt the Attorney for the Insurance Company would have liked to say. This time, the they suspect that the head of the Insurance Corporation PAC was involved in less-than-honorable (for an Insurance Company) endeavors. The extra money was his new retainer. Judging from the size of it, it was representative of how heavy and hard the new suspect's henchmen are.
Wayne shrugged a little. He knew he could handle them.
Now, Wayne was sitting in the plush office sitting there while the Attorney for the Insurance Company read through the report.
Wayne leaned back and looked around. It was furnished in "Danish Modern", very minimalist, with elegant wood. The desk was in the corner, so it could get eastern and southern sun exposure. He had some sort of fancy blind system and window tinting to prevent too much sun. The windows had wider sills than normal, giving the impression they were half seats, reminiscent of the leaning seats in older Paris Metro stations.
The desk looked like two open end tables with a bridge between them. Or should I, given the atmosphere, say betwixt?
Wayne was actually glad he came to the offices of the Attorney for the Insurance Company: he had not seen an office in Danish Modern in years and years. It did not match the occupant. Youngish, dressed in "mod-conservative", no doubt to show he was laid-back, ready to throw out trendy jargon, and know the hit that flooded the airwaves until sane people were ready to drill rusty paperclips into their ears to stop the awful "ear worm".
But in reality, he was full of himself, the most pompous stuffed shirt Wayne had to deal with since that Executive from Victoria, BC.
The Attorney for the Insurance Company leaned a bit to his right, pushed a button, and someone entered the room.
She was well dressed, as was everybody in the company. Wayne realized he would have noticed that, regardless of gender. Not that it matters.
She was wearing charcoal slacks, black conservative-looking shoes, and a black blazer with some sort of whatever underneath. Her hair was black and straight, going just beneath her shoulders. She handed him an envelope.
Wayne looked at it. It was payment. And it was considerably larger than they contracted. He looked up at the Attorney for the Insurance Company with a raised eyebrow.
Without a word, he took a sheet of paper from his desk and handed it to Wayne.
Hot damn. That's high up. This is now officially a "big case".
Without a word, Wayne got up and exited. Down on the street he inhaled deeply. He had indeed found the culprit, but now he was hired, or "engaged" as no doubt the Attorney for the Insurance Company would have liked to say. This time, the they suspect that the head of the Insurance Corporation PAC was involved in less-than-honorable (for an Insurance Company) endeavors. The extra money was his new retainer. Judging from the size of it, it was representative of how heavy and hard the new suspect's henchmen are.
Wayne shrugged a little. He knew he could handle them.
Thursday, April 1, 2010
Re-Run: Christopher Walken Roasts a Chicken
If you haven't seen this (either the last time we posted it (along with the "Weapon of Choice" video) or on your own), it's a must-watch. And no, it's not a gag, despite the date.
It's Uno de Abril!
ThinkGeek, which produces geeky stuff (or "stuff for smart masses"), has shown again a nice touch in April 1st tomfoolery. The whole slate of April Fools products can be seen on the ThinkGeek homepage, but here's my favorite:
2010 - The year toys make contact.
Deep in the heart of Aisle 7 (the action figure aisle), all throughout the 70's, 80's, and 90's, something waited. No one knew it was there, until toy stores began their turn of the century renovations. Then the Monolith Action Figure was discovered (the first given the name "TRU-1"). What was it for? Where did it come from? Why wouldn't its barcode scan? No one knew. And no one knows to this day.We here at ThinkGeek have some theories, however. We think the Monolith Action Figures were left by some ancient, extra-galactic, action figure intelligence. We believe, based on our tests (including pH, electromagnetic, and taste) these Monolith Action Figures will eventually cause other action figures to evolve. We're not sure if that means gaining better accessories and articulation, or becoming sentient. Either one is cool in our book. The Monolith Action Figure looks great on your desk, wall, or shelf, and will definitely be the most talked about toy in your collection.
Monolith Action Figure
* Properly proportioned to those in the movies 2001 and 2010 (1:4:9 - the squares of the first 3 integers).
* Made of semisynthetic, organic, amorphous, solid materials (AKA plastic).
* Zero (0) points of articulation.
* May cause strange magnetic fields, action figure evolution, seeing things filled with stars, and/or more (or it might just sit on your desk doing nothing).
* Dimensions: .75" x 3" x 6.75"
Last year, ThinkGeek's selections were so good that one of the joke products--the Tauntaun Sleeping Bag--is now a real product!
Vampire Thursday: Emo Vampire
Emo Vampire got a message in his inbox. He knew this because his parents' computer, in the living room, in front of everyone, has this annoying habit of beeping whenever someone's mailbox got a message.
Well, it only did that when the mail application was open. He had still not gotten used to the fact that he was not allowed in his lair any more, nor was he allowed to use his own computer. But he hadn't changed his behavior.
Welllll, except for that one time. I LIKE OTHER CULTURES. *.JP SITES HAVE REALLY COOL LANGUAGE, AND I DIDN'T KNOW IF I CLICKED THAT, IT WOULD SHOW THAT. NO I DIDN'T KNOW THEY WERE ALLOWED TO DO THAT TO A RODENT, BUT YES, THE ANIMATION IS NEAT, BUT NO, I DON'T UNDERSTAND THE EYES, EITHER.
After promising to be better about surfing, and agreeing to more restrictions on said surfing, Emo Vampire was slowly adjusting.
He went back upstairs to his room, leaving the application open, and the mail unread.
He sat down, and stared.
At least they have let me keep the hair.
*sigh*
(photo credit)
Well, it only did that when the mail application was open. He had still not gotten used to the fact that he was not allowed in his lair any more, nor was he allowed to use his own computer. But he hadn't changed his behavior.
Welllll, except for that one time. I LIKE OTHER CULTURES. *.JP SITES HAVE REALLY COOL LANGUAGE, AND I DIDN'T KNOW IF I CLICKED THAT, IT WOULD SHOW THAT. NO I DIDN'T KNOW THEY WERE ALLOWED TO DO THAT TO A RODENT, BUT YES, THE ANIMATION IS NEAT, BUT NO, I DON'T UNDERSTAND THE EYES, EITHER.
After promising to be better about surfing, and agreeing to more restrictions on said surfing, Emo Vampire was slowly adjusting.
He went back upstairs to his room, leaving the application open, and the mail unread.
He sat down, and stared.
At least they have let me keep the hair.
*sigh*
(photo credit)
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