Timmy Tebow's Tough Tears

Aren't yummy and sweet to some Roman influenced writers around here. So I should probably tread lightly...


Or not. At least (unlike a certain FSU lineman) he moved after each and every snap. Too bad about some of the things he did while moving...

Afternoon Bland

Have you ever noticed that synonyms aren't quite exact. You'd say one thing in one context, but the other in another?

And what about alternative spellings?

Mundane Monday

Snow covers the ground like a blanket
The blanket covers the parts you dont want to see
However, we all know it's there. Just like that facade.

Ironic Sunday: Video

nuff said




credit the artists. thanks to the poster.
if you have the urge to buy their stuff, from any era, I strongly recommend seeking medical help.

Tagsky Recommends

Our newest, bestest buddy, "Tagsky", who exploded into our hearts hier shall now have a recurring feature until it gets old. Or maybe it just won't get old. Yah never know!

And now, hier is Tagsky:

Thanks, moose. Very nice. I just flew in from Tampa, and boy are my sister's arms tired. See - get it? ha ha. A twist on the Marx brothers. I believe Karl and Zeppo did that routine. Stop it. Cut. It. Out. Dave Coullier is a fave. What talent!

Ahem. Tough crowd.

Today I'd like to recommend "San Diego Yoga". First hepping came hier as we learn that this particular method of yoga (ironically from San Diego, as we all know what that means when translated into English), emphasizes non violence to the self.

That has to be a good thing. So don your favorite merkin, get your short shorts on (preferably so you have the "spider effect", but I shan't elaborate, and go ahead and do your San Diego Yoga.

This is Tagsky, handing it back to the moose.

Thanks, Tagksy. Glad to have you in a guest feature. What a fascinating blog you have, by the way. Womby. Sehr Womby. Most womby indeed.

Starting the Week on a Boring Note

Well, is it?




That's a neat trick. With the link. Neat.

Anyways, hier's a little poem:

frozen on the ground
the snake talks with the rabbit on all things sharp and prickly
meanwhile, the kite dances in the sky and the children jump and laugh
the end of lines dont' always entail a stop

On A Boring Wednesday: Saturday Edition

The spider is basking in the sun on the blind. The blind can see what the spider is doing. Basking in the sun. The weak, December sun.

Emphasizing the Mundane

It was a tasty sushi pack for lunch.

And I like toast.

Sulu Friday: Rejected Star Trek Spin-Off

In 1982, Paramount negotiated a deal with CBS to launch a new drama series, The Devil and Mr. Sulu. Pitched as Star Trek meets The Wild, Wild West, the show was to feature George Takei, reprising his role as Lt. Sulu, and Louis Gossett, Jr., as the Prince of Darkness, in a campy romp through the Old West.

In the pilot, Mr. Sulu, flung back to the 1880s after a bizarre time-traveling accident, is forced to partner with a mysterious and demonic sheriff named Luke Ifer in order to escape the clutches of outlaws in Kansas. After inadvertently revealing his secret to Luke, Mr. Sulu agrees to return to town to help Luke enforce the law--Luke's law--all while trying to figure out a way to return to the 23rd century.

The series looked like a promising combination of science fiction/western/buddy cop show, but, due to pressure from the Moral Majority (which opposed the not-entirely-evil depiction of the Devil), the show was never aired.

Insipid Happenings

Yesterday, I walked home. Then I changed my mind. Picked up some groceries, but I forgot something. Took a cab. Home.

Didn't sleep as well as hoped.

But was able to exercise this morning.

Hoping for concentration to figure out the Phase III.

Florida State Lineman: So Fast You Can't Even See Him Move

Due to an increasing inability to out-recruit the other Florida schools (not to mention out-of-state schools that recruit heavily from Florida), Florida State has apparently turned to using statues in place of actual players. Let's watch:

Urkobold-Funded Project Has Opening for a Lap Dance Research Officer

THE URKOBOLD URGES HIS FEMALE MINIONS AND READERS TO APPLY FOR THIS POSITION AS A LAP DANCE RESEARCH OFFICER--GREAT WAY TO GET A LITTLE EXTRA MONEY FOR CHRISTMAS AND TO HELP ADVANCE SCIENCE. HOWEVER, PLEASE NOTE THAT YOU MUST HAVE "prior experience of conducting research in the female sex industry" AND A POSTGRADUATE EDUCATION TO APPLY. THAT AND A HOT, HOT, BODY BUILT FOR SCIENCE.

Research Officer - The rise and regulation of lap dancing and the place of sexual labour and consumption in the night time economy
(Job reference: 316199)

Faculty of Education, Social Sciences and Law
School of Sociology and Social Policy

(Full-time, fixed term 12 months from March 2010)

You will work on an ESRC funded study on the rise and regulation of lap dancing and the place of sexual labour and consumption in the night time economy. The post will involve qualitative and quantitative data collection and analysis. It is based in Leeds, although some travel to other cities may be necessary.

You will have, or be about to complete, a postgraduate qualification in the social sciences or relevant subject and some appropriate research experience. You will be mainly responsible for access and fieldwork. Good interviewing, communication and organisational skills are essential as is the ability to work independently and as part of a team. Experience of interviewing and conducting surveys is essential, as is prior experience of conducting research in the female sex industry.

It is anticipated that interviews will take place on December 14 2009

Salary: Grade 7 (£29,704 - £35,469 p.a)

The appointment will be made at £31,513 p.a or below since there are funding limitations which dictate the level at which the appointment can start.

Apply using: Application form, CV and Equal Opportunities Monitoring form

Download an application form: (pdf version)|(Word version)

Informal enquiries: Dr Teela Sanders t.l.m.sanders@leeds.ac.uk

Send completed applications to:

Anne Prendergast, email a.prendergast@leeds.ac.uk

or by post to:

Anne Prendergast,
Social Science Building,
The University of Leeds,
LS2 9JT.

Closing date:
27 November 2009

Job description and person specification

Anticipated interview date:
14 December 2009

Back off man, I'm a scientist.

Found: The Technoviking's Mother!

***Shocking Update!***

In an amazing moment of journalistic synchronicity, our researchers have located video of one of the Technoviking's illegitimate children! What a great day in techno history!

Philosophy Wednesday: Kant's Kritik der Urteilskraft

Today's lecturer will focus on Book I of the Kritik der Urteilskraft (Critique of Judgment), the Critique of Aesthetic Judgment. This work looks beyond judgments of the beautiful and the sublime, analyzing how objects about such judgments are made.

Let's listen to the lecture:

* Liberated from io9.

The Urkobold Speaks: Reader Mail

TODAY'S LETTER COMES FROM ZACK K., A FIFTEEN YEAR-OLD URKOBOLD FAN FROM BATON ROUGE, LOUISIANA:

Oh Almighty and Vengeful Urkobold,

Bro, your site is fucking awesome. Awesome! I 'bate to pictures in your archive almost every day! That chick with the lobster--whoa. I'm gonna ask my girlfriend if we can do it with a lobster, right after she lets me touch her bra.

Speaking of tits, whatever happened with that cool business plan you had to, you know, advertise stuff on women's boobs? [ed.: Rackvertising.] That was great! Oh, and can you include pictures in your response?

Your humble servant,

Zack

P.S. Those Drug Songs of the Day are the greatest! I'm doing three or four times as much shit as I used to.

THE URKOBOLD'S RESPONSE:

DEAR ZACK,

THE URKOBOLD THANKS YOU FOR YOUR LETTER AND FOR THE FIFTY DOLLARS YOU UNDOUBTEDLY STOLE FROM YOUR MOTHER'S PURSE. IT WILL BE SPENT ON A GOOD CAUSE.

TO ANSWER YOUR QUESTION, THE URKOBOLD HAS OPTED TO FRANCHISE HIS RACKVERTISING™ BUSINESS TO ENTREPRENEURS ALL OVER THE UNITED STATES. UNTOLD MILLIONS HAVE BEEN PAID TO THE URKOBOLD ALREADY. AS EVERYONE KNOWS, SEX = MONEY.

ONE OF THE MOST SUCCESSFUL RACKVERTISING CAMPAIGNS WAS LAUNCHED THIS PAST SUMMER, ON BEHALF OF THE MOTORBOAT MANUFACTURER, EVINRUDE. HERE'S A SAMPLE PHOTO:


YOURS IN UTTER SUPREMACY,

THE URKOBOLD

Man vs. Toddler

I think this is B.S. Yeah, sure, if you fix the contests to ones that the Man has a clear advantage at, sure, he'll win. But I bet the Toddler has some skills that the Man does not. For instance, who would win the yoga competition?

Monkey Tuesday: Random Moments in Monkey Television