The Onion: Health Care Plan Would Give Seniors Right to Choose How They Are Killed

From the article:

WASHINGTON—President Barack Obama held a nationally televised address Tuesday to "clarify any misunderstandings" about his health care proposal, assuring Americans that under the new bill senior citizens—and not the federal government—will have the right to choose how they are executed.

See the whole bit. Not bad. I've been less enthused with The Onion in recent years, but they've hit on some good ones lately. The money hole video was nice, for instance.