Monday, January 12, 2009

The Urkobold is Disturbed

THE URKOBOLD WILL NEVER WATCH SCOOBY-DOO THE SAME AGAIN. WHO KNEW VELMA HAD SUCH A DISTURBINGLY ENORMOUS RACK? LESBIANS? REALLY?

AND NOW, THE URKOBOLD MUST GO AWAY AND THINK ABOUT THE IMPLICATIONS OF THE NAME, SHAGGY. WHO AND WHAT, PRECISELY, DOES SHAGGY SHAG? AND FRED? IS FRED, IN FACT, A MAN WHO LOVES MEN? THE URKOBOLD DOESN'T KNOW WHAT TO THINK ABOUT THAT ASCOT.

THE URKOBOLD BLAMES CRACKED.COM AND ITS "10 Female 80s Cartoons That Ushered Us Into Manhood" ARTICLE FOR ADDING DISTRESSING DAPHNE-VELMA LOVE FANTASIES TO HIS ALREADY CROWDED MIND.

***SHOCKING UPDATE***

AFTER DIRECTING HIS MINIONS TO SCOUR THE WEB IN SEARCH OF MORE VELMA-DAPHNE PORN. . .ER, THAT IS, FOR MORE INFORMATION ABOUT THIS TROUBLING DEVELOPMENT, THE URKOBOLD HAS LEARNED THAT "SHAGGY" HAS, IN FACT, PUBLICLY REVEALED MANY DEEP SECRETS ABOUT THESE MEDDLING KIDS AND THEIR PERVERSE WAYS. JOIN THE URKOBOLD AS HE LISTENS YET AGAIN AS SHAGGY TELLS ALL.

5 comments:

Sen. Bill "Spaceman" Nelson said...

Please, let me know your perverted cartoon lust concerns as well. I'm here to serve all of your needs, Florida!

Pro Libertate said...

Is Scooby-Doo one of those things that works both on an adult level and for kids? Like Rocky & Bullwinkle?

highnumber said...

Nope. Never did before.

This may change things. I'll be in Stevo's bunk pondering this.

Stevo Darkly said...

WHO KNEW VELMA HAD SUCH A DISTURBINGLY ENORMOUS RACK?

I've always known. I've wanted to see her de-turtlenecked for decades.

Pro Libertate said...

Stevo,

Not surprisingly, Velma porn appears to be well-established on the Internet. Other than you, the Urkobold, and Velma, who knew?